More lists, taking in Gregg Wallace's happiest feelings and Rihanna chucking up ribbons
8 movie characters you wouldn't want to fuck with, by Jordan Rizzle Kicks
1 Liam Neeson as Bryan Mills (in Taken)
Literally slaps up most of Paris in 96 hours.
2 Brad Pitt as Mickey O'Neil (in Snatch)
3 Gary Oldman as Stansfield (in Leon)
No one plays gun-toting villains like Gary Oldman.
4 Vincent Cassel as Jacques (in Mesrine)
He holds up a judge at gunpoint. Enough said.
5 Keanu Reeves as Neo (in The Matrix)
Can literally do anything.
6 Denzel Washington as Eli (in The Book Of Eli)
Can batter people while wearing a backpack.
7 Samuel L Jackson as Jules (in Pulp Fiction)
Just wants to be the shepherd.
8 Ben Kingsley as Don Logan (in Sexy Beast)
Doesn't take no for an answer.
Rizzle Kicks' single Mama Do The Hump is out on Boxing Day
Alistair Darling's finest single malts
1 Glenkinchie
2 Oban
3 Bruichladdich
4 Bunnahabhain
5 Dalwhinnie
6 Lagavulin
7 Talisker
8 Springbank
9 Laphroaig
10 Rosebank
Al's book Back from The Brink: 1,000 Days At Number 11 is out now
Gregg Wallace's happiest feelings
1 The birth of your child.
2 The second date with someone that you know really likes you.
3 Coming home to a very excited and happy dog.
4 Waking up and realising that you don't have to go to work.
5 Watching your favourite team score a try or goal.
6 Getting off an aeroplane and feeling the heat.
7 Dinner at Le Gavroche.
8 Somebody at work telling you that you're good at what you do.
9 Your child coming home with a very good school report.
10 Getting or giving a present that you or they really wanted.
MasterChef returns in 2012
10 stirring Scottish anthems, by Lorraine Kelly
3 A Girl Like You, by Edwyn Collins
5 Labour Of Love, by Hue And Cry
6 That's When He Told Her, by the Proclaimers
8 Mary's Prayer, by Danny Wilson
9 No More I Love You's, by Annie Lennox
Lorraine, Mon to Fri, 8.30am, ITV1
Olly Murs's favourite pasta shapes
1 Spaghetti
Long and thin
2 Penne
Short and round
3 Fusilli
Short and spiral-shaped
4 Tagliatelle
Flat and thin
5 Lasagne
Flat, in sheets
6 Cannelloni
Fat and round
7 Ravioli
Small and square
8 Macaroni
Short and bendy
9 Tortellini
Ring-shaped parcels
10 Rigatoni
Fat and bendy
Olly's tour starts in Cardiff, 1 Feb
Sooty's 10 greatest loves
1 Soo
His girlfriend of 40 years.
2 Fish & chips
Fact! Sooty creator Harry Corbett was the nephew of northern chippy magnate Harry Ramsden.
3 Putting strawberry jam in Sweep's bed
Hee hee.
4 Singing Silent Night
5 His favourite chocolate bar
WISPA!
6 Pizza
He hospitalised Paul Daniels by knocking him out with a ham and cheese.
7 Water pistol fights
He squirted Prince Philip with water while Harry received his OBE.
8 Good fabric conditioner
9 Telling jokes
Q: What does Sooty's best friend cook at a barbecue? A: Sweepsteak.
10 Playing the drums
He's a big fan of Iron Maiden.
The Sooty Christmas Show, Garrick Theatre, WC2, to New Year's Eve
4 suggestions for The X Factor 2012, by Marvin JLS
1 Bring back Simon Cowell
It would be a crime if Simon doesn't return next year. He should sit on a hydraulic chair above the other judges with the power to overrule everyone.
2 Force Dermot to dance
Dermot should have to do a dance routine at the end of each show, and the judges decide whether he stays to present next week, or is replaced by Phillip Schofield.
3 Give the judges a buzzer
I miss when Simon used to put his hand in his air. Everyone just shouts these days. They should buzz if they want to speak.
4 Introduce I'm A Celebrity-style bushtucker challenges
The finalists should have to eat witchetty grubs while they're waiting to sing. They should also have to do the course from Total Wipeout.
JLS' new single Do You Feel What I Feel? is out on New Year's Day
10 top Joneses, chosen by Milton Jones
1 Indiana Jones
2 James Earl Jones
3 Norah Jones
4 Tom Jones
5 Bridget Jones
6 Davy Jones
7 Corporal Jones
8 Terry Jones
9 The Dow Jones Index
10 Catherine Zeta-Jones
Milton Jones: The Lion Whisperer is out on DVD now
Dynamo's must-have watches
1 Rolex Matte Black Submariner
I always saw Rolexes as old man's watches until I saw this one.
2 Hublot Big Bang
If you're not a high-flying rapper or a Premier League footballer then you probably won't ever own one. But we can all dream!
3 Meccaniche Veloci Quattro Valvole
This was the watch I got for myself when I signed the deal for my first TV series. It has four clock faces so you can keep track of four different time zones at the same time. I had to get it!
4 Audemars Piguet Prestige Sports Royal Oak Offshore Navy Chronograph
If you want to really show your watch credentials, it's all about this baby, but at �18,490 you might need to bring security!
5 Jacob & Co Epic II E15 Ferrari Red Dial Limited Edition
One of the only Jacob watches that isn't covered in diamonds. I'm not really into all the bling.
6 Chanel J12 Black Ceramic
Chanel watches have a quality to them that makes them timeless ? no pun intended!
7 Casio Military Spec G-Shock With Night Vision
This is the watch I wear most days. It's practically indestructible.
8 Classic Casio CMD 40-1ZT Remote Control
If conversation runs dry, you can always use it to turn on the TV.
Dynamo: Magician Impossible is out on DVD now
THE UNAVOIDABLES
The people who defined the year by being all over it
Ryan Gosling
Blue Valentine, Drive, Crazy Stupid Love, The Ides of March
Women went crazy for him, men went gay for him, even puppies admitted Ryan was the cutest of them all.
Jessie J
Conquering UK & America, understanding people with no legs
Octave-abuser Jessie J went from new artist to queen of pop to talent-show judge in 12 months. Next year, it'll be panto.
Jessica Chastain
The Tree of Life, The Debt, Texas Killing Fields, The Help, Take Shelter
Everyone wanted a piece of the classy new redhead on the block, and whaddya know? Everyone got one!
Professor Green
Rapping, guest-rapping, services to T4
He released his own album, and guested on others, but Pro G's real achievement was being ubiquitous on youth TV, from his own reality show to Hollyoaks.
Stephen Graham
Boardwalk Empire, This Is England 88, Pirates ?, Tinker...
He used to be Britain's go-to psycho, now he's everyone's go-to psycho.
Olivia Colman
Rev, Twenty Twelve, Exile, The Iron Lady, Arrietty, Tyrannosaur
From long-suffering to long-suffering and not about to take it any more, Colman was mustard.
Tom Hiddleston
Archipelago, Thor, Midnight In Paris, The Deep Blue Sea
Eton, Cambridge, Rada, Asgard: say hello to Britain's new toff at the top.
Daniel Craig
Cowboys & Aliens, The Adventures Of Tintin: The Secret Of The Unicorn, Dream House, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo
With Bond temporarily out of action, Craig took what quanta of solace he could find.
5 PUKES THAT SHAPED OUR YEAR
Perhaps it was caused by disgust at the state of the world, or maybe there was a lot of uncooked seafood about; either way you were never far from a pool of vomit in 2011.
Rihanna
At the climax of We Found Love, the Daily Mail's least-favourite pop diva puked ribbons. It could have been a comment on Broken Britain (the vid's set on a council estate, oddly) but more likely she confused party poppers with the pick'n'mix.
The Inbetweeners
You don't get to be the most successful British comedy movie of all time with just puke gags, but Will's boat party boking binge certainly didn't hurt.
Bridesmaids
You don't get to be the most successful etc etc ? but the girls outdid the boys when a dodgy Brazilian buffet erupted everywhere.
Contagion
In order to convey the seriousness of his global epidemic, Steven Soderbergh had to show Kate Winslet hacking her guts up. It worked.
Frankie Cocozza
May well have up-chucked during his "wild night out". He made us sick, anyway.
Source: http://www.guardian.co.uk/culture/2011/dec/24/celebrity-lists-guide-2011
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