marylsommers: Dear Jeremy

Problems at work? Need advice? Our agony uncle ? and you, the readers ? have the answers

I'm 63 and have my second wind. Should I train as a teacher?

I'm 63, but don't look or feel it. I worked for 39 years in the fashion trade, but then retirement and a move to the country drove me mad with boredom.

I was lucky enough to be offered a part-time job in the fashion department of the local art school, as a technician ? which is pretty menial. I love the students and my colleagues and it led to teaching an evening class for one term (as maternity cover). I feel that I've got my second wind, and want to develop this as a new career, but on paper I'm so old. In a small department with few staff, I already spend a bit of time actually teaching.

Is it worth spending time and money at my age getting more teaching qualifications? I already have a first-level City & Guilds teacher's certificate, which only really covers me for teaching at evening-class level. Or should I just sit back and consider myself lucky to have this job?

Jeremy says

You're right; you are lucky to have your job. But your local art school is also extremely lucky to have you. You say you love your students and your colleagues; I bet they all love you, too.

Now that you've all got to know each other, your actual age is immaterial. Nobody even thinks about it any more. So it's tempting for me to say: you'll go on enjoying yourself, and being appreciated, for years to come yet. So why not settle happily for what you've got, see what develops naturally; and it won't much matter if nothing much does.

And yet. You've got this second wind. At only 63, you've got years of fully active life ahead of you. It would seem a shame to waste your appetite to develop your skills and career still further. You really shouldn't try to suppress it. With luck, your part-time job should allow you enough freedom to start to acquire those extra teaching qualifications.

If so, go for it. You'll be short of time ? and probably short of money, too ? but you certainly won't be bored and you'll have a huge sense of purpose and achievement that will make everything more than worthwhile. Too many people find themselves in their 60s and feel they've somehow got to behave as people in their 60s are supposed to behave. And all too often it becomes self-fulfilling. That's never been necessary and it's certainly not necessary today.

Do what your instinct and your energy incline you to do; and in 10 years' time, I bet you still won't feel 63.

Readers say

? I don't think you should train to be a teacher. That isn't to say I don't think you should teach, but you come across as interested and passionate about what you do ? will you honestly be this excited about teaching a pre-scripted curriculum to bored 12-year-olds in a comprehensive school somewhere?

Why not develop your lecturing and adult education skills and teach something you love to people who want to learn? FE colleges and adult education centres are always looking for experienced (read "older") people with a real spark and an ability to inspire ? and they'll often pay for qualifications like the City & Guilds. Green 123

? I taught for 11 years; for the past 15 years I have run my own business offering chess teaching to schools (I was a county-strength player at my peak) as an after-school or lunch time club. A similar arrangement might suit you ? and no, you wouldn't need to do a one-year (or more) training course for that. Wowbagger

? If you can find the right school, a better option [than teaching] may be as a higher-level teaching assistant (HLTA). They have as much, if not more, contact with the students than many teachers, and a good HLTA, employed to do the right jobs, is an amazing asset for a department, or a group of departments if the school is small. ShrewdOtter

? I changed careers, and countries, at 55, and took my MA (with distinction) at 62. Don't ask, just do it. Euromuz

? Listen to Euromuz, but be ready for the reality to be bumpy, and don't borrow to do it. Also, don't expect to learn too much about teaching during the training. You might find that you enjoy teaching evening/adult classes more. valence

The ethical finance company I joined isn't being fair to women

I am a senior female professional and recently left a job to join an established ethical finance organisation that has built its reputation on fairness and being equal and honest. I took a drop in salary to join what I thought was an organisation more aligned with my values. However, I am beginning to doubt whether the values are actually lived.

All my male colleagues on the same pay band, and a few on the band below, earn significantly more than me (on average, 25% more) and receive benefits such as company car and relocation packages that I cannot access "as I didn't negotiate them into my contract when I joined". There seems also to be a predominantly male culture ? with only one female executive and very few female seniors, leaving me short of female role models and mentors.

This makes me conclude that it's not the place I thought it was and bought into and therefore doubtful this is the place for me. However, there are not a lot of jobs about and I have only been in this role a few months, so it would be hard to explain at interview.

Was I naive to believe the value-based claims? Or is there something I can do to rectify the situation and improve the experience of more junior females and others who may join for the same reasons I did, only to become disillusioned?

Jeremy says

Before you can decide what you should do, there are a couple of facts you need to establish. The first is: does your "ethical" finance organisation behave entirely ethically, as far as you can tell, in its dealings with its clients? This is a critical question. If you have a strong belief that this company is not totally straight in its business dealings, then you should prepare to get out as soon as you practically can; nothing you could do personally could possibly influence a fundamentally corrupt corporate ethos.

But if their inequitable behaviour seems to be internal only, and heavily influenced by their predominantly male culture, then it could be worth your while, before you throw in the towel, to attempt to achieve change.

So next, if you haven't already done so, you should have a proper but fairly informal conversation with this one senior female exec. It should become quickly apparent whether she's aware of the company's male bias (she could hardly be otherwise) but has resigned herself to living with it; or whether she'd welcome some gentle and progressive internal reform.

Be careful not to go in with all your worst suspicions on display. If she sees you as a firebrand she'll understandably remain extremely reticent. She may already have had to make some uncomfortable internal compromises herself and won't thank you for reminding her of them.

The more aggressively critical you are, the more she'll feel bound to defend the status quo. But if she gives the slightest indication that she'd welcome help with progressive internal reform ? and believes it to be possible ? then you'll have an opening; and one that, however unpredictable the outcome, you probably have a responsibility to pursue.

The certainty, however, is this: if your company is essentially unethical, or if the senior woman in that company doesn't recognise the need for change, nothing you can do as an individual will either allay your own concerns or be of value to others.

Readers say

? I'm also a female professional in a male-dominated financial industry. There are very few senior female role models, even outside my own organisation.

It is well known that women are less aggressive in salary and promotion negotiation. If you accepted the first offer they made given that you had to take a salary cut, it's not hard to imagine that a male applicant may have negotiated harder for higher salary.

So while it's disappointing to feel disillusioned, perhaps you had too high a hope for your company's integrity. After all, most are geared towards shareholder returns and the less they pay you, the better. I would give it a bit more time and see if you can negotiate a higher pay rise for the next review.

I genuinely think most senior men don't see gender. The problem arises because they expect us to act like them but we don't, because of our cultural upbringing and genetics.

While I'm one of the few women at my level, I see many more starting at the more junior level. The more of us that stick around, the more likely men will have to understand women better and work with us, rather than make us work on their terms. IdeaJunky

? If the company negotiated a package with you which they knew was 25% less valuable than your male peers, I'd say you should file an equal pay claim. If you're getting along with your colleagues, I wouldn't leave. But I would definitely explore available remedies to this sex-based discrimination. LinneaSR

For Jeremy Bullmore's advice on a work issue, send a brief email to dear.jeremy@guardian.co.uk. Please note that he is unable to answer questions of a legal nature or reply personally.

Read next week's problems on the Money blog from Monday and post your advice ? we'll run the best of it alongside Jeremy's in next Saturday's column.

Jeremy Bullmore

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